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Mom Shaming: Part 1

Mom Shaming is an unnecessary aspect of being a mother/parents; when other mothers or just random/ordinary people judge and make comments about what you do/are doing as a parent. Not everyone may have experienced it, but those of you who have were not pleased after. For reference, where I'm from we call our mothers Mam and that's what'll be saying from now on, as saying mom is not the norm for me.

I feel that the whole concept of Mam shaming has become so normal now; purely because our society now is so used to judgement and pressure from anyone and everyone that negative comments and looks are like expected, unfortunately. I think the most common type of Mam shaming I see now is definitely from other parents and non parents, but mainly regarding "routines"

I noticed that a lot of people make comments to mothers like "Why is he not asleep? It's already night time.", "How come they haven't had lunch? It's already past lunch time.", "Aren't you going to give her a bath? She's been outside all day.", "Why are they still napping? They don't need it at this age.", "It's late, they should have been in bed ages ago." I honestly feel like MOST parents know their children the best and gradually learn to make routines that work best for their child/children and them too; so why does it concern everyone else? I mean, I can understand if it's just an honest question from a friend, but if someone is quite literally questioning your parenting, with some type of negative connotation or a questionable tone then I think it's not their place at all.

It's difficult because I feel that parents and mothers are constantly questioned for their choices regarding their kids, when in reality it has nothing to do with anyone but the parents and the kids (most the time). I can only imagine how strenuous it could get if it's a family member asking those questions, because I guess you know in your heart they are not commenting to put you down; they may be asking because they feel like you might not be making the best choice and think you should do something else. Either way I think as long as the child is healthy, safe and happy and the parents are doing what they think is best; no matter who it is, no one should really involve themselves into anyone's parenting unless specifically asked.

You'd be surprised how common Mam shaming is and whether you think this is shaming or not; in the long run a mother or father who is constantly questioned and asked what they are doing and why they are doing it, is not going to gain much positivity from these encounters; as they can feel enough pressure in life without all the added opinions and side-eyes.

Don't ever feel alone in your journey; their are millions of other parents, families, mothers and father who may feel the same as you when it comes to the pressures of family members, society and everything else in-between. You are doing amazing.

*Disclaimer: I am not an expert/a medical professional. These blogs are based on personal opinions, views and research done by myself.*

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